Painting makes me happy. Tech issues make me cry.
You may picture me sitting at an easel most of the day, but really, that's not the case. As an artist, I'm a small business owner and a solo practitioner. If I don't do it, it doesn't get done. I'm the sales force, the data entry clerk, and the marketing, production, and finance departments rolled into one. Sure--it's a very, very small business. But all the moving parts are there. So without those computers and the programs and software I depend on to keep my business running, it's not. Running, that is.
So why did dire thoughts of retirement enter my head? I've reached the three-quarter century mark, a point when most of my peers have decided to put their feet up and enjoy lives of intended leisure. But there's no good reason for an artist to retire, or at least to stop making art, as long as there's more pleasure than pain in the process.
But here it is: Computers are a pain. Equipment that doesn't work is a pain, and completely different than solving problems in the two dimensions of a painting. That's a joyful process. Painting badly never makes me cry; hour after hour of technical frustration does.
But in the end, I guess I'm not ready to give up. I'll get the darned things repaired and start in on new and as yet unimagined levels of frustration with updated programs and operating systems. I'll remember that there's beautiful stuff out there to paint, that there's so much still to learn, and that painting makes me happy.
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